HomecaregivingSculptor in Chief


Sculptor in Chief — 2 Comments

  1. When my Bob was diagnosed with Stage IV pancreatic cancer six years ago this past weekend, I felt like the proverbial “shoe had dropped”. Of course this was the cross we two would bear! Bob’s less than healthy lifestyle of smoking cigars and drinking beer had caught up to him; and in my case I would be assuming the most important nursing caseload in my career. Now we both had to prove our worthiness.

    Looking back over that feverish three months before Bob finally succumbed, I sincerely hope – and feel- that we accomplished this, each in our own way. Bob told me repeatedly that he was sorry and found ways to lighten my load, even taking a trip to PETCO to find the right kind of litter box for our cat. ( He had previously been the kitty-cleaner-upper.)

    For my part my sense of having to be places on time was severely tested. This usually happened on days when he had an oncology appointment at the office clear across the county. Inevitably just when we were ready to head out the door Bob would have an emergent potty run, rendered more difficult because our home did not have a main floor bathroom. After helping him onto the commode, then cleaning up after, our drive to the MD was often a race. Bob would sense my tension and encourage me to “take a deep breath”, meanwhile apologizing for the “inconvenience”. I finally developed the presence of mind to tell him, “Not to worry…you are the love of my life.” Three hospitalizations for infection also took its toll.

    We both emerged from this test stronger and hopefully wiser, leaving time open for us to say goodbye, thanking each other for a truly wonderful forty seven years. RIP, Hon, you will always be greatly missed!

    • Your beautiful story is proof that the word “love” is verb and not a noun.
      No doubt you made the last path of Bob’s life’s journey full of light for both of you.
      Indeed, RIP, Bob.

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